Hey there new mama! Hope you are doing good. Today’s blog hits the emotional spot for all the new moms out there. We are here today to talk about the ‘Judgments’ and ‘opinions’ or let’s say’s ‘unwanted’ ’unasked’ opinions! Don’t we all find them annoying and still have to deal with them! Let’s say these unwanted comments and opinions are part and parcel of the whole pregnancy and postpartum period.
I had read a quote where it said – New mom is not tired because of the baby but because of the people around who constantly judge but never help.
Post delivery the world sees a new mom and imagines joy.
Smiles.
Warm cuddles.
Tiny socks and soft blankets.
But no one sees the moments in between.
No one sees the tears that fall quietly at 3 a.m.
The exhaustion that sits heavy on the chest.
The way your heart races when the baby cries…
even though you’re doing everything you can.
I still remember the morning I walked out into the hall holding my baby—
eyes tired, hands shaking, hair barely tied. I remember how so many people had so many things to say about my baby’s weight, height, looks. Well my milk supply too was a big topic of discussion.
A relative looked at me and said,
“You look so tired. Are you even managing properly?”
I wanted to say:
“I haven’t slept in three days.”
“I cried while feeding last night.”
“I’m scared I’m not doing enough.”
“I’m trying. So, so hard.”
But all I did was smile.
A tired, broken smile.
Motherhood didn’t break me.
People’s opinions did.
And then came the whispers…
“She’s not holding the baby right.”
“She’s too emotional.”
“She should be stronger.”
“She’s overthinking.”
They didn’t know that I was silently battling something I couldn’t understand myself —
something so many new moms face but never talk about:
postpartum blues… and the fear that it might be postpartum depression.
The sadness without reason.
The sudden heaviness.
The emotional overwhelm.
The feeling of being judged for every move.
It was a storm inside me,
and every judgement felt like thunder making it harder to breathe.
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🌙 THE NIGHT EVERYTHING CHANGED
One night, after a long day of comments and “advice,”
I sat on the bed holding my baby and crying harder than I ever had.
I wasn’t crying because I was weak…
I was crying because I felt alone. Maybe all thought I was too hormonal to be this emotional. But all I knew that no matter what others had to say .. I am a MOTHER now and for my child I am ENOUGH !
My baby’s tiny hand touched my cheek.
Just a soft touch… but it felt like a message.
In that moment I realized:
My baby doesn’t care about people’s opinions.
My baby only cares about my love. And being a present mom was more important than being a perfect mom.
Not how I feed.
Not how perfectly I hold her.
Not how well-rested I look.
Not how others judge me.
Just me.
I wiped my tears, took a deep breath, and whispered:
“I will protect our peace.
I will not let anyone else decide what kind of mother I am.”
And that night, I found strength I didn’t know I had.
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🌷 10 WAYS I LEARNED TO HANDLE JUDGEMENT AS A NEW MOM
These are the exact things that slowly pulled me out of emotional exhaustion and helped me heal.
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1. I Allowed Myself to Feel Everything
Sadness, frustration, confusion, fear — all of it.
Postpartum hormones are real.
Emotions don’t make you a bad mom.
Suppressing them makes everything harder.
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2. I Spoke to Someone I Trusted
One honest conversation with my partner changed everything.
Or maybe just vent out about your emotions to your best friend.
If necessary you can fight or even shout at someone if that person is crossing too much boundaries!😂
Overwhelming emotions are OK! Letting out is OK!
Release the emotions.
You deserve support.
You deserve someone who listens.
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3. GIVE NO DAMN! Yes really ! Repeat this constantly- I don’t give a damn about what others have to say about me or my baby.
Some comments hurt more than they help.
I learned to walk away — not out of disrespect, but out of self-respect. Your peace lies in your hands.
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4. I Stopped Taking Every Opinion Personally
Many people speak without understanding what a new mom goes through.
Their words reflect their character, not your capability.
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5. I Created a Small Emotional Boundary Around My Heart
My mantra became:
“Not every comment deserves space in my mind.”
It saved me.
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6. I Recognized the Signs of Postpartum Emotional Fatigue
Crying often
Feeling overwhelmed
Feeling “not enough”
Getting triggered by small comments
Feeling guilty 24/7
These signs don’t mean you are failing —
they mean you are carrying too much alone.
Just breathe at this point. Look at your baby’s face. Or maybe look at a smiling photo or a cute video of you and your baby together. It’ll release a lot of stress.
You and your child. That the whole point. Nothing else matters.
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7. I started trusting Mother’s instinct.
No book or a person knew my baby better than me .
I stopped seeking approval.
I started seeking moments — the soft cheeks, sleepy smiles, warm hugs.
I silently kept record of my baby’s growth. Nothing to prove anything to anyone. Just a mother’s check on her baby.
These moments heal more than you realize.
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8. I Responded With Calm, Neutral Phrases
Instead of explaining myself, I said:
• “We’re doing what works for us.”
• “Our doctor recommended this.”
• “Thank you, we’ll keep that in mind.”
Less talking.
More peace.
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9. I Celebrated Small Wins
Some days the win was simply bathing the baby.
Some days it was feeding without crying.
Some days it was just getting out of bed.
Small wins matter.
They build confidence.
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10. I Reminded Myself That Good Moms Are Not Perfect Moms
Good moms make mistakes.
Good moms cry.
Good moms get tired.
Good moms feel lost sometimes.
But they keep loving their baby —
and that is what makes them good.
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💛 CONCLUSION — A LOVE LETTER TO YOU, MAMA
If you’re a new mom feeling judged, misunderstood, or emotionally tired…
breathe.
You are not alone.
Your feelings are valid.
Your journey is unique.
Your baby already thinks you’re the best mother in the world.
People’s opinions will fade.
Their comments will be forgotten.
But the love you give every day — even on your weakest days —
will stay with your baby forever.
You are doing enough.
You are strong.
And you deserve kindness — especially from YOURSELF!
So hold your head high, Mama!
Your are perfect mother for your child! 🩷
And as it is said, a child will be placed in your arms by god , because he knows you are capable of being a good mother to your baby.
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